Ignoring your #2 and Other Tips For Moms Expecting Their 2nd

Lately, everywhere I turn, someone is expecting their #2.  So, I thought I’d put together a short list of tips/observations/what to expects from a mom who — 5 years later — remembers the transition well.

  1. Remember when your first was a newborn and you had that video camera in hand recording your 5 day old baby doing a whole lot of nothing?  Well, when #2 comes, you will not be recording your baby’s adorable yawns.  Instead, you will be dealing with/tending to your #1, and #2 will hang out in the bouncy seat — ignored, yes — and guess what?  The ignored #2 will turn out a-m-a-z-i-n-g.  If only I had been able to ignore my first…
  2. When your mom or friend or partner takes your older child out and you are left to care for just the baby, you will feel as if you are on a vacation.  You will realize that all that baby does is sleep, eat, pee and poo, and that caring for a newborn only is easy peezy.  How the heck was it so damn hard when you had your first, you will say.  It just is.  We all go through it.
  3. Enlist as much help as possible.  It will be hard at the beginning, and having a supportive network of family and friends, or hired help, makes a huge difference.  It does get easier though.  For me, a huge turning point was when my baby turned 1 (and my older one, 3).  That’s when they turned into playmates (and I could finally start to ignore both of them).
  4. When your first was a baby, you may have signed him up for music class, taken him to playdates and done all sorts of fun things to celebrate being a new mom.  #2 will get no such fanfare.  He will just tag along to #1′s classes and playdates.  Nor will there be any framed photographs of baby #2 on the mantel until at least his or her first birthday.  Again, all of this is fine.  Just watch how awesome he/she turns out without all the fanfare.
  5. 2′s are amazing.  Prepare to fall in love.

p.s. For more tips, check out my interview on the transition from 1 to 2 featured on You Plus Two Parenting.


2 Responses to Ignoring your #2 and Other Tips For Moms Expecting Their 2nd

  1. Natalie Nevares May 22, 2012 at 11:13 pm #

    Well said, Chana! Yes it’s all very humbling isn’t it? Accepting support and imperfection are absolutely key.

  2. Rachel May 23, 2012 at 4:15 pm #

    Great post Chana! Well put indeed. Thanks for the shout out too. :)

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